


Here and Now

by cupidty11



Series: Knotted [3]
Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Gen, M/M, Mutual Pining, Other, Slow Burn, Text Format, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-05
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2018-08-29 04:23:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8475196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cupidty11/pseuds/cupidty11
Summary: Friends Through Lovers.They’re partners in protecting the Earth and friends. Where will the future lead them? It’s impossible to know. But, the only thing that really matters for them, is here and now.





	1. Preventative Measures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two days ago they’d reached planet Earth’s rotation with the full intention of marking the planet a part of the Garshnock Empire. Even if that planet was incredibly out of the way of any kind of populated star system. According to their readings, Earth was the only planet with ‘sentient’ life for lightyears around.
> 
> Their Rule was expanding and quickly. It was necessary. That was the known law of the universe. You became a Galactic power or ended up as an unwilling gear in some larger empire’s machine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://photos.google.com/share/AF1QipMFLj5dIpUBpW6VSxd7HVFyJbdJbSDxEhZN85OO29rvGhutp6OwL8VkpSrBnxU5mw?key=V2RDVllsUmtmU0tUWmdVOW9aZ1B4QlR0Sy1CbWF3&source=ctrlq.org)

 

Captain Malak-a was glaring at the ship’s readings, all red and flashing. As if someone had known exactly what to do to make it so that they were basically sitting in a metal deathtrap. No way out. No way to call for backup (not that any would be forthcoming).

The door slammed shut and Looma-r, her co pilot, flattened himself against it, out of breath. He looked terrified, all four eyes wide with panic.

She sneered in his direction. “I’m guessing you didn’t take care of the problem.”

He shook his head, gulping in air and crossing the room to her. Only closer, did she note the singe marks along his left side.

“What happened?” Malak-a hissed. Although she may not be a figure of compassion, she cared for her crew.

“T-there’s an irken.” He swallowed, eyeing the flashing systems screen. Things were only becoming more and more dire. “And one of the creatures from this planet.”

“What? An irken?” The captain growled, claws curling into tight fists. “Are you telling me THEY are responsible for this...this catastrophe?” He nodded vigorously.

“They’re working together.”

Malak-a quickly pressed in a series of commands. Nothing worked. Nothing! Whoever had done this had a lot of experience with wrecking things.

“That’s ridiculous! Irkens work with no one. They barely work with each other.” Their species was violent. Raised to be natural killers. And even the ones that didn’t become soldiers, were dangerous. Competitive and rude to boot.

“I know what I saw, Captain! They were communicating! They shot at me!” Looma-r gestured wildly at his burn marks. She turned to looked at him fully, examining his posterior. Either whoever was attacking them were terrible shots or... Hard pounding at the door. Looma-r had locked it at least. She growled and pulled her weapon from the holster around her waist.

“You idiot. You led them here.” Voices on the other side, harsh languages that she had never bothered to learn so she couldn’t reply. Her co pilot jumped behind her, shaking with fear.

“I-I’m sorry.” Her rage faded from him and she directed it towards their intruders. Towards whoever had wrecked her ship. To whoever had the gall to attempt to impede the progress of the great Garshnock Empire. There was the sound of lasers, a bright, burning pink and a perfect square of metal fell into the room. She readied her weapon, not willing to go down without a fight. She saw a ‘human’, delicate looking, so strange. It had a grim look on its face and she raised the barrel to shoot it right in its stupid head.

Another bright pink blast. She screamed as pain overwhelmed her. Malak-a dropped the gun to hold her hand to her chest. They’d shot her. She hissed and dropped to the floor to pick it up again, only a tiny black boot kicked it out of range. She looked up to see an irken. Looma-r had been right.

Instinctively, a thread of fear pulled tight in her chest. Irkens were terrifying. Even this one, despite it being one of the smallest ones she had ever seen before. But, her natural fear was replaced quickly with anger, hatred and pride. Her people were some of the only races in their corner of the galaxy that had never succumbed to the irken menace. She refused to die to one this day.

It barked something at her, pink eyes flaring up with arrogance and rage. Beside it, the human stepped forward and placed a hand on its shoulder. She narrowed in on the action. Never had she seen irkens touch, or allow anyone to touch them. Even in battle. She waited for the inevitable rage that would follow, it would strike this human down for daring to lay a finger on it.

And yet...she saw the irken’s face change. It softened, the anger dulling instead of flaring up to a new height.

And that was perhaps the most terrifying thing she’d ever seen.

Beside her Looma-r was shaking, perhaps equally as shocked. Perhaps he was just scared. The human stepped forward and she regarded it warily. It said something to the irken who replied in the same language. It nodded and watched her, equally as wary.

“Why are you here?” The irken finally said, looking incredibly displeased to be speaking their language. She scowled, disliking hearing a filthy irken using their words, anyway.

“None of your business, irken scum.” The irken sniffed disdainfully and she heard it relay her words to the human who tilted its head to the side. A strange patch of hair on its forehead rose at the words, an annoyed glower at its irken companion.

“What is it saying?” It ignored her for a second, waiting until the human was done speaking.

“He. His name is Dib. He said, ‘ _Let me guess. They’re from another species that your people managed to piss off,huh?_ ’ And my name is Zim.”

She sneered. “Like I care what you call yourself, you cog.”

Zim returned the sneer. “Forgive me for attempting to be polite.”

“Irkens don’t know the meaning of the word. Why are you on my ship?”

“To find out why YOU are here.”

“Did that really require destroying my vessel?”

Zim shrugged. “Not really. But, it made things much easier.”

Malak-a curled her hands into fists, shaking with rage. “If you kill us, more will come, scum.”

The human, Dib said something again. She turned her attention back to him, uneasy under his gaze. Perhaps it was how pinpoint his eyes were. Tiny black dots, surrounded by gold.

Zim sighed, exasperated. “He wants to know who you are? What your names are.”

She was taken aback. “I refuse. Our names are our own, no one but those close to us might know them.”

Zim threw his hands in the air. “I tried to tell him that!”

It was only now that she noticed the lack of gloves. And of uniform. He wore human clothes?

“You...you say you are ‘Zim’. What is your title?” All irkens had them. Even the lowest of the low carried their title before their names. Tallest Red and Tallest Purple. Elite Scientist Blar. Invader Tenn. Table Headed Service Drone Bob. Titles were important, vital. It was their position in the machine.

She watched the irken freeze, saw him glance away, then look at the human, searching, as if asking for help. But, he said nothing. He swallowed before lifting his chin.

“I am...Zim. That is all.”

She watched him warily. This was no normal irken. “You...have no title? Then you...” She thought hard. “Then what is the matter with you, little irken?”

Zim growled and went to lunge for her. But, the human stepped in his way, held him back, said some things to him that had the anger on his face dissolving again into a manageable irritation.

It was downright eerie to watch.

The human turned to her and said something in it's strange flat language. Zim sighed and began to translate, eyes looking anywhere but at her.

“Dib says, _‘Just tell us why you’re here. We don’t want to hurt you. We’re just trying to protect our planet._ ’”

A ripple of shock went through her and she could feel Looma-r jolting a bit with the realization. An irken...protecting a planet? With one of the members of the planet? No uniform? No title? This was way too weird. It went against everything she had ever learned or seen about the most violent, powerful race in the known Universe.

Looma-r was the one who spoke. “We-we’re from the Garshnock Empire. We are to mark this planet for conquest, it will be added to our ranks.”

Zim’s face contorted into rage and he relayed the information to the human. She turned to glare holes into her co-pilot who wilted under it. The human spoke back, hands and arms moving all over as he talked. His face was pinched with...with some emotion. Humans had strange expressions. She couldn’t quite read him.

Malak-a watched the irken wave away the human’s words and turned towards them, face a mask of neutrality.

“You will not. You will leave this planet and never look back. This planet is not and will never be under control of any outside species.” Zim lifted his chin again, evil eyes molten with some unnameable emotion she had never seen on an irken. “We will give you two rotations of the planet to leave the Earth’s atmosphere. If you haven’t by then, we will destroy you.”

Malak-a opened her mouth to shout back, but he had already swept from the room. The human soon followed, shooting them one last unreadable glance.

She seethed on the floor where she had fallen before, still holding her injured hand that thrummed a new sharp pain with each pulse. Looma-r swallowed anxiously beside her.

“W-what do we do, Malak-a?”

The two of them; a human and an irken (who was either banished or defective, that was the only explanation) had managed to take down all the defensives and most of the offensives that their ship had within a few short minutes. They had rendered them all but useless, injured Looma-r and herself.

The stubborn part of her wanted to stay, to stand up to them. But, she wasn’t an idiot. This wasn’t meant to be a battle. They had no real choice if they didn’t want to be ‘destroyed’, whatever that truly meant.

“We retreat. And find a different planet for our Empire.”

And tell everyone the bizarre thing they had witnessed here. No one would believe it.


	2. Of Birthdays and Loyalty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zim talked and talked, pausing occasionally only when Dib asked a question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, so I'm suffering from the opposite of insomnia rn. I'm so tired and I've been sleeping WAYY too much which in turn makes me more sleepy for some reason?? so yeah if this sounds bad I'm sorry. Anyways, I have two more weeks of school then I'm out until next semester... so hopefully I can get some good writings done.  
> Thanks for all the amazing and lovely comments!! I read them all and cherish them.

The metal magenta wall was stamped with the irken empire’s sigil. Every day for the last seven years, every time he walked past it, Zim had saluted with a little wiggle of his antenna. And if he was feeling particularly patriotic, a full on invader’s salute, fist over his spooch.

The day after Dib had emailed him back, after he’d single handedly broken down a century of denial...Zim had done the salute out of habit. Then he’d froze, realizing what he’d done.

Loyalty to his Empire was as natural as breathing. He’d been taught from smeethood the greatness of his leaders, of the Armada’s ever growing hold on the universe. Zim had been drilled on statistics of genocide, death, destruction and made to feel pride for it.

He’d stared at the Irken’s symbol, how it bore into his mind, and felt guilt. Not just for how he’d turned his back on the Empire (never mind how they had done it first) but also, for saluting in the first place. He’d thought of Dib. His great enemy. Now ally. He thought of how the Dib, so pathetic and human, had somehow managed to garner just as much loyalty from Zim as his entire empire had.

It was unfeasible. It was treason. It was...was borderline defective. He’d shoved all those thoughts aside. He was unable to truly think on them. The weeks passed, their truce held steady and he continued to automatically salute his Empire. And each time he’d be frozen with warring forces of guilt.

Zim tried to call them. The Tallest. Of course he knew what he would find. A static screen, an error message. Thoughts of denial used to fill his head. They were out of range, they were really busy, the lines were down.

Now though he knew with a dreaded certainty that his calls were being blocked. Zim remembered shamefully how he’d fallen to his knees and screamed for hours with the realization. He’d broken things, expensive equipment, shattered test tubes and screens. He’d been blind with rage and betrayal and-

Gir’s big blue eyes brought him back. They stared up at him, unknowingly.

“Youse upset.” The tiny robot had declared. And he’d held out the disgusting thing in his hand, some drool covered toy. He offered it to his master, that it might make him feel better.

Zim refused to touch the thing but, he’d picked up Gir instead, held him tight against his chest. “I-its alright, Gir. We...we don’t need them, anyway...” Zim ignored how gross his little minion smelled. His own voice sounded hoarse from screaming. “It’s like the Dib said, th-they lied to me.” The words felt filthy on his tongue. Darkness clawed at his chest. It was lies. Such horrible lies. All of it, everything.

Gir let himself be held limply, understanding nothing. “Okay. You wanna watch tv?”

* * *

 

The insignia tortured him. Every time he saw it he felt a twinge of muscle memory loyalty. But, time passed. As it always did. The disgusting guilt he felt warped into rage. He pictured the entire Armada, laughing at him. Zim imagined the twin grinning faces of his leaders as they sent him to the far reaches of their known universe, hoping he never returned. The anger gnawed at his guts, made his blood boil. He stared at the symbols, seething with unshed rage until he felt he would be sick.

Zim did his best to just not look at it. He refused to acknowledge the giant gaping wound in his identity. He unconsciously filled it in with unsolved mysteries, conspiracy theories, haunted houses, protection charms, late nights playing video games and eating too much sugar, typing back and forth for hours and hours...he filled the hole in his soul with amber eyes and laughter, with camping under the stars and protecting each other’s backs...

Zim replaced the aching loneliness that he’d always pretended not to feel, with x files re-runs and trashy sci fi novels, with colorful clothing of every shade and fabric, and with music. Irkens had banned music long ago. It was silly, it was pointless. It could carry messages that couldn’t be filtered. And music was incredible. It hummed in his skin and lifted his spooch. Dib made him a special pair of speakers that attached to his antenna for the anniversary of their Truce.

Then one day he glanced over at the magenta wall, the embedded symbols of his past, of his people. And he felt only a faint aching sadness. For what he used to be. For what he used to think he belonged to. For a place in the Empire that he had desperately wanted to be part of.

Zim placed a hand over the irken insignia. Once he had wanted to be forever remembered. He’d wanted to be an Invader. He was going to be the best one they had ever seen. He would bring pride and glory to his species. Now the idea rang out hollow in his mind.

What use was it? What use was his name in some stupid records? What use was their approval? It had none because Zim knew he would’ve never been satisfied. He would’ve wanted more. He still did. He wanted their love, their acknowledgment that he was the best irken to ever live, he wanted their apologies and their fear.

And it would never, ever happen.

Zim covered the insignia up. Painted it over with black and with a crudely drawn picture of Earth.

 

* * *

 

_ **AgentMothman** is now online.  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** is now online.  _

 

 **AgentMothman:** Hey

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Hello you are up late

 **AgentMothman:**  I guess?? Just a few hours later

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Why?

 **AgentMothman:** I dunno, just couldn’t sleep. What are YOU doing up?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** I do not sleep you inferior bean, you know this

 **AgentMothman:** Lies. I’ve seen you sleep.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Incorrect, as per usual. that is recharging.

 **AgentMothman:** Do you close your eyes?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** uhh yes?

 **AgentMothman:** Do you lose consciousness?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Yes, I suppose so

 **AgentMothman:** Do you dream?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** not really. But, sometimes memories replay.

 **AgentMothman:** soo

 **AgentMothman:** basically, what you’re saying is that

 **AgentMothman:** you sleep

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** NO

 **AgentMothman:** i mean that sounds a lot like sleep to me?? But what do i knw

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** jkdfhskdf you drive me crazy

 **AgentMothman:** I aim to please

 **AgentMothman:** ANYWAY

 **AgentMothman:** whaaaaat are you doing tomorrow?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** i do not know. maybe cleaning out GIR because he is filthy

 **AgentMothman:** Gross. What if instead of that, you helped me celebrate my birthday?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** what???

 **AgentMothman:** yanno, the day I was born. Or I guess? The day they decided I was ripe enough to remove from the little test tube thingy they had me in idk

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** no i mean...you just had your birthday

 **AgentMothman:** yeah. Last year.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** it has already been a year?!!!!!!??!?!?!?!

 **AgentMothman:** man you’re really getting the hang of punctuation, ZIM.

 **AgentMothman:** Yeah. I was 20. Now I’m gonna be 21.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** impossible

 **AgentMothman:** nope. Just time.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** oh

 **AgentMothman:** lol yep

 **AgentMothman:** Zim?

 **AgentMothman:** Zim you okay??

 **AgentMothman:** do i need to come over there orrrr??

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** NO ITS FINE

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** : I mean

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** : Do not worry your tiny brain. It is fine.

 **AgentMothman:** Uh huh. I mean...you SEEM fine. *sarcasm*  <\- jsyk

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Thank You Dib I am quite aware it was sarcasm.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** what were your plans for your birthday celebration?

 **AgentMothman:** ummm i dont know. There’s no big party this year. I went and got lunch with dad and Gaz today so nothing to do with them. I was thinking we could just watch movies or something.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** hmmm...that is a terrible idea

 **AgentMothman:** thanks

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** I have an idea!!!!

 **AgentMothman:**  really?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** YES

 **AgentMothman:** tell me??

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** NO

 **AgentMothman:** why not?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** : It is a secret! A Surprise, if you will!

 **AgentMothman:** oh. Great.

 **AgentMothman:** will your surprise, maybe, possibly, kill me?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** no of course not, you stupid idiot with hair.

 **AgentMothman:** well good. What time should I come over for this ‘surprise’ that won’t totally kill me? Also what should I wear? Are we talking like...stuff that I’m ok with getting ruined? Or my hiking junk??

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** UM 4 O'CLOCK AND WEAR THE BLACK TIE

 **AgentMothman:** Caps, ZIM

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** sorry. kind of. 

 **AgentMothman:** alright, I will do that then

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Good I imagine that you are absolutely trembling with excitement about the prospect of such a surprise

 **AgentMothman:** well, I wouldn’t go that far. But, I’m definitely intrigued. I’m actually a little bit surprised that you haven’t already blurted it out tbh

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** : how dare you??

 **AgentMothman:** just speaking the truth, my small lizard pal

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** shouldn’t you be sleeping? I know humans need lots of sleep because they are inferior and disgusting

 **AgentMothman:** haha well, you got one thing right. I should be sleeping.

 **AgentMothman:** Good night. I’ll see you tomorrow, I guess.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM:** Yes, yes have good rest Dib

_**AgentMothman** is now offline. **  
NORMALHUMANZIM** is now offline._

* * *

 

The doorbell rang and Zim answered it, expecting the human on the other side. He was also expecting that Dib would look different than he normally did, since his usual outfit would be replaced with something nicer. Something 'black tie'.

But, he had no way of expecting his own reaction to seeing the human.  Zim’s face suddenly felt too warm, his spooch beat a little too fast. He ate up Dib’s familiar presence like he was dying of starvation. The human’s hands were shoved in his pockets, the fading sun caught on his hair, the creases in the dark fabric. His skin was tanned a bit from too much sun, freckled like smatterings of stars. His clothes were pressed and clean. Zim's antenna twitched under his wig as a light breeze blew. Dib smelled like his shampoo and laundry soap. Zim grabbed his own stomach. It felt like something was stuck in there, it wanted out.  

“Hi.” Dib said, first. “That’s usually what people say when they see each other. They don’t just stare.”

Zim blinked. “Yes, hello.”

The human raised an eyebrow. “Are you...okay?”

“Uhh huh?! Yes, yes. I am fine.” Zim shook himself until the strange sensations dissipated. “Better than fine. I am amazing. Perfect.” Earth air sure did weird stuff. All the pollution and global warming and...and whatever.

Dib’s lips curved up into a little smirk. “So, am I coming in? Or are we driving somewhere?”

Zim stepped aside for the human.

“Nice dress.” Dib said, casually. “So, what's the surprise, Zim?” The little irken brushed non existent dust off his outfit. Yes, of course it was nice. He only wore things that were worthy for him. Dib was trying to seem nonchalant, Zim noted. 

“You must have patience, silly human boy." Pause. "But, if you must know, I am taking you to space.” Zim watched his guest eagerly for a reaction. 

“Space? You...you had me wear my fancy clothes...for space?”

Zim nodded, excited.  “That is a birthday thing, is it not?” 

Dib shook his head, exasperated. “Sometimes, I guess.”

The irken hesitated as he pushed the button that would bring them, standing in the center of his living room to the roof where he kept the Voot.

“Um. Space. Is...is space alright? I mean...” He didn’t want to admit that his amazing idea might actually be lame. It was just the only thing he could think of. Dib liked space, right? “We could um, do something else. If you wanted.” 

“No. No.” Dib shook his head, earnestly. “ Space... space is awesome, Zim.” He laughed quietly. Zim’s antenna twitched at the sound. “I mean, more than awesome honestly. I’ve only really ever gotten to see it when we were like...fighting? So, yeah.”

“Exactly!” Zim shouted. He was glad that his plan had remained rightfully brilliant. Dib just smirked at him, half heatedly wondering if he should remind his friend about inside voices and decided against it.

 The two of them managed to squeeze into the Voot Cruiser side by side as they had tons of times before. But, for some reason Zim was suddenly quite aware of how little room there was. How it caused them to touch. Their arms and sides, shoulders. How much space Dib took up with his big head and broad shoulders and it was just downright uncomfortable.

Zim made a mental note to see about expanding the Voot’s size. All of those thoughts disappeared once they were past all of Earth’s atmosphere and into the dark recesses of space.

It was silence. Cold and dark encompassing the tiny vehicle. The void was merciless. It could destroy even the bravest or strongest within seconds. And yet it also contained every element, every building block for life, for suns and trees and music and useless knick knacks on shelves at dollar stores.

It was vast and ever expanding. Terrifying and beautiful.

Zim had explored it for many, many years. It was easy to take it for granted. To say ‘been there, done that’. But, one look at the human, at the utter awe and delight...and it reignited his own passion for the vast infinity.

Zim flew the voot along the edges of Earth. They admired the heavy clouds, the billions of shining lights. Before shooting off further into the Milky Way, spending time at each of the planets. Dib spouted off fact after fact that he’d learned from his long hours of researching.

“A year on Saturn is like...29 earth years. Isn’t that so weird? And it’s gigantic. I mean I guess you can see that. And its super pretty. Even if its just a bunch of gas.” Dib babbled, face nearly pressed against the Voot’s window.

Zim watched him warily, only mildly annoyed at the little grubby fingerprints the other was leaving. He looked down at the planet his companion was spouting random trivia about. Yeah it was alright, he supposed. Not the nicest thing he’d ever seen. But, not the ugliest either.

“Meh.” He replied, simply. Dib sent him a look.

“What do you mean ‘meh’? Saturn is amazing.”

“I mean, its okay, Dib. But, I have seen much more impressive planets in my lifetime.”

The human’s attention was fully on Zim now and that fact alone was enough to have Zim grinning smugly.

“Oh yeah,spaceboy?”

Zim regaled the human with tales from his exploration years. Or even with his assignments as a scientist or a elite soldier, both of which had taken him far from Irk. He told Dib of planets with buildings carved from giant crystals. Of oceans of rainbow sands. Of bloodthirsty creatures with giant teeth and beady eyes. Of planets that had gigantic libraries and seemingly endless flea markets with every product imaginable. He told the human about mountains so tall and deadly that no one had ever been able to climb them successfully. Of lush lavender jungles and the strange creatures that lived there. Zim talked and talked, pausing occasionally only when Dib asked a question.

It was only when Dib’s stomach made such a loud noise that it startled Zim and sent them both into small laughing fits, that they flew back to Earth.

“That all does sound incredible.” The human remarked, whimsically. A side glance showed Zim that his eyes looked far away. 

“It was...” The irken searched for the words. It HAD been very fascinating. But, now that he thought back on it, his younger self hadn’t actually cared much for the planets he’d been on. It had all been very mechanical and about assessing planets for resources. Not about appreciating them for their intrinsic value. “Alright.” He shrugged.

“Just alright?!” Dib exclaimed, pressing a hand to his head. “I would absolutely love to just...just explore the Universe! That’s been one of my dreams since before I could even comprehend what space was!” The glowing cities of their planet rose up closer. Soon they would be home. “I want to see it all!”

“Hmm, well.” Zim’s forehead furrowed in thought. “Such exploration would probably require you leaving Earth for a very,very,very long time.”  If not forever. And that didn’t seem like something the Dib would be very keen on. He eyed the human for a reaction and was astounded to see him just shrug.

“Yeah, I guess so. But, it would be worth it, right?”

Zim opened his mouth, then closed it again just as quickly. Dib would just...just leave Earth? Leave everything he’d ever known? Would willingly drop his place as loyal protector of his planet...all to just go see some space rocks?

  
“I’m hungry.” Dib interrupted the irken’s thoughts. He laughed a bit. “What do you think they’d say if we went through the drive though with your Voot?” 


	3. Going Native

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> True to his word, Dib pulled up in his terrible vehicle and jumped out, taking large strides towards the irken. Zim hadn’t realized he had his arms wrapped tightly around himself until he saw the other, until he felt compelled to stand straight and tall. He watched the human look him over, dark eyes searching him for any sign of harm before meeting his gaze. He was calm and concerned and determined. Zim was a mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally don't know why my brain decides to switch from past to present tense during writing but it does. I tried to fix it as best I could but if some of the wording is weird, thats why. 
> 
> Anyways, sorry for taking so long with this. Been struggling a bit with life and junk and I had college to contend with plus a serious lack of motivation and sudden re ignition of love for harry potter fanfiction. 
> 
> Congrats, silly fandom on the news of a tv movie!!! ily all thanks for the delightful comments. each one means the world to me!

“Hello valued customer. How are you today?” The cashier smiled a harried smile, as Zim dumped his arm load of plastic tubes on the hardware store counter.

They rolled and bounced. He blinked up at the speaker. “Eh? Wha--are you talking to me?”

The cashier began scanning the tubes. “Um...yes?”

Zim crossed his arms, suspicion coloring his entire demeanor. “Why?”

Beep. Beep. The tubes went into plastic bags.

“Uh...I guess because it’s polite?” The cashier looked downright bewildered, confused as if they had never thought of it before. “Everyone does it?”

They took the wad of cash that Zim shoved at them with the grace of someone who has done it all before.

“Oh...well,” The irken’s brow furrowed. How had he never noticed such a thing before? It seemed impossible. “I am...” He searched for the right words, the proper emotions. “Frustrated. My dog broke all my plastic tubing.” He gestured at his new purchases. “Every single one of them.”

The cashier seemed a bit taken aback but, they soon caught up. “I had a dog once that tore up every single piece of furniture I owned.”

Zim hummed sympathetically. Yes, Gir had done that before too. “Well, I hope they don’t do it again!”

Zim took all the bags that were handed to him. “As do I, um...” He squinted at their nametag. “Leedla.”

This earned him another smile, this one a bit warmer than the one before. “Have a good day!”

This again, struck him as odd. Someone commanding him to have a pleasant day. But, Zim decided he had had enough with the human faux passes and hurried on his way.

After that, he began to notice the strange phenomenon everywhere. The tall man who held the door open for him. The wide lady on the street who smiled at him. His neighbor with no legs and was always outside, always tending his lawn and garden, who began to wave at him every time they passed each other.

When Zim was feeling particularly brave, he tried out the human pleasantries.

“Hello, how good has your day been?” He would say to the stranger next to him on the elevator.

“Good afternoon and/or evening.” Zim called to the family that walked down his street.

“How is everything you are doing?” He asked his neighbor, who always had a big smile in his strange wrinkled face when Zim gave him the time of day. Through a few small exchanges he learned the man’s name to be Louis, he was a war veteran, he loved the outdoors.

The bizarre human words tickled his mouth. The very action of daring to communicate and connect with complete strangers...even if only for a small second. A strange vulnerability happened when he put those words out there, not knowing if they would be well received. But, it was like a lottery. High stakes, little risk. On Irk, he would’ve been glared at, maybe even arrested for disturbing the peace. Here though, most everyone would shake out of whatever they were doing and SEE him, talk to him,compliment him on his clothes etc.

One afternoon, when the sun was falling below the heavy clouds, painting the world a faint orange, Zim noted that his neighbor wasn’t outside watering his lawn. This was strange as he knew for a fact that the man was ALWAYS out there this time of day.

“He’s fine.” Zim murmured to himself. “Probably just out. Or busy.”

When the same thing happened three days in a row, with no sign of the old neighbor man, of Louis, a pit of concern grew in his gut, unfamiliar and unpleasant.

On the fourth day of no lawn watering, Zim knocked on the fading red door. Twice. Thrice. Four times, he knocked. Zim’s polite human demeanor fell and he went to break down the door, only to have it open with ease. The house was fairly neat, lined with old pictures.

“Mr...Louis? Sir?” Zim tried, creeping slowly further in. Under his wig, antenna twitched.

Something was wrong. Everything was too still. Distantly, a tv played some old sitcom. Air was stale and there was something there, some strange smell...something faint.

He made his way towards the sound of the television. “Sir...?”

Louis was sitting slumped in his chair, the light of the tv falling over him.

Oh. The smell. Death.

Zim stared at the body, unable to put the pieces together. That the lively, crinkled old man who waved at him every day was this small, smelly, empty...thing....

The fake audience on the tv show laughed at something unfunny.

Louis was fine. Aside from being dead, that is. No injury, no obvious sickness... it stood to reason that he died from natural causes.

Zim had seen death before as a soldier....and simply as an irken. As a species that revered conquering, genocide. For Irk's sake, he had _killed_ before. _Caused_ death. But, for some reason, for some stupid reason, Zim had never put it all together. Humans were so frail. They could do incredible things. Be incredible.

But, they were always going to be...this. Dead. All humans. Even...Dib. _Dib_.

Zim shoved a shaky hand into his pocket, pulled out his phone. It rang twice before he heard his voice.

“Zim? What’s up?” Was the human’s curt greeting. They largely communicated via text when not together. Something was obviously wrong.

“I...” His throat felt dry. Though something tight in his spooch eased. “My...my neighbor is dead. I...I don’t...I do not know how to proceed.” There was a moment of silence and Zim knew Dib’s brain was whirling, putting pieces together, deducing the situation from the lack of information and previous conversations.

“Go stand outside the house. I’ll be there in five.”

The sun had already fallen. The street was dark but for the artificial orange glow of street lamps and windows. How long had he been in there? Staring at the corpse of this once lively human?

True to his word, Dib pulled up in his terrible vehicle and jumped out, taking large strides towards the irken. Zim hadn’t realized he had his arms wrapped tightly around himself until he saw the other, until he felt compelled to stand straight and tall. He watched the human look him over, dark eyes searching him for any sign of harm before meeting his gaze. He was calm and concerned and determined. Zim was a mess.

“What happened?”

Zim told him everything, distantly aware of his own voice. He unconsciously clung to the human’s expressions, the heat that radiated off him in waves, the quiet, steady strength he exuded in a similar fashion. And meanwhile, Zim was unable to do anything but, stand like a soldier, talk like a soldier and pretend like he wasn’t feeling like he might fall over at any second.

“Zim...” Dib’s voice was deep and rough. It sent little vibrations though his bones.

“What?” He asked, empty. There were crickets chirping near by.

The human sighed, reached out, gripped his shoulders. It startled him even as delicious warmth seeped under his skin, chased away the chill.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what? You...you did not kill him. He was old. He was...human.”

SIlence but for crickets and the distant sound of traffic.

“Yeah...Yeah he was, Zim. I’m,” He heard Dib swallow. “I don’t really know what’s bothering you so much here. If it’s the death itself. The fact that it’s your neighbor. Or...something else? But, whatever it is, I’m here, ok? And we can get through this.”

Zim frowned down at their feet. Dib’s were so much larger. So much clumsier. He was wearing the same boots he had the last two years. They’re scuffed and dirty and the laces were hanging loosely as if he’d not bothered to waste the time in tying them.

He let the human put him in the car, watched him call the police and speak with them.

Zim was aware that every minute, every second was passing too fast.

Death was inevitable, even for irkens. But, they die by choice, by fighting, by murder, by injury. Never by age or sickness. They’re built to withstand as much as possible before giving in. Humans...humans were messy. They were finite. And death came for them much quicker. He’d noticed it before. But, never understood what it meant.

He’d watched the humans around him age, grow. Dib had become taller, wider, deeper, calmer, smarter. Older. And one day, maybe tomorrow, maybe in the next few years, maybe decades from now, Dib would die. With luck he would become wrinkled and grey and frail. But, no matter what, the Dib would die.

And that realization, was what had his spooch beating hard with terror. Zim couldn’t help but replace the corpse he’d seen slumped in the living room with the severe faced human who was currently standing under the streetlamps, running a hand through his hair. Could so easily imagine him pale, stiff, unseeing eyes. Everything that made him Dib, his smile, ridiculous determination, unmatchable curiosity... gone.

Zim retched, felt his spooch spasm with a phantom agony.

Luckily, he didn’t vomit in the human’s already disgusting car. But, the nausea and pain remained.

It couldn’t happen.

“It will not.” He hissed. It was an oath and ZIm meant it more than he had meant anything else in his entire existence.

* * *

 

It took several more hours of police questioning and general waiting around until they finally pulled up to Zim’s yard, a whole three houses down.

They sat in heavy silence for a minute.

“Are you--?”   
“Will you--?”

They shared a look and it was enough to effectively shatter the miserable atmosphere.

The human smiled softly and shook his head. “You go.”

Zim felt a familiar tugging in his chest and he was just as confused as he was the first time it happened. The events of the last few hours were the only thing that let him shove it away, to avoid questioning it for yet another day.

“Come inside.” He said, simply. It was a command but, it’s quiet and he looked away, at the red and blue police lights.

Dib watched him for a second before he turned his car off and climbed out.

* * *

 

They’re in what Zim has begun to think of as the ‘human’ area of his lab. It was a small section that once only held a small bed. Now, it had mutated. As time went on, more and more silly human garbage invested it. There were a couple large cushions (bean bag chairs, Dib said matter of factly to zim’s horror), a tv and video game console along with many select titles.

They’d gone to the nearest game stop and just grabbed a bunch of random games from the bargain bin. Zim took great delight in trying to figure out how to play it while Dib ran a scathing commentary. It usually ended with them laughing so hard it was impossible to continue playing.

There was one of Dib’s jackets flung over the small table in the corner, several books and journals, empty soda cans.

Past Zim probably would’ve exploded then imploded at the sight of disgusting human things making their way past the first level of his base, past the facade.

Present Zim found the entire thing amusing, faintly irritating and perhaps, most surprisingly, comforting in a way he would never admit, not even to himself.

“You know,” Dib said, flopping down in one of the ‘bean bags’. “We should get a mini-fridge for down here.”

Zim eyed him, removing his wig and contacts and tossing them on the table. “Fridge. You mean the inefficient cooling rectangle in your kitchen.” He huffed, falling face forward onto the bed. “I’m sure I can create something much better.” He didn’t need to see Dib to picture his response to his muffled claim. Probably a raised eyebrow, a small smirk. Mostly it was just his eyes. Full of incredulous amusement..

“Sure. But, I doubt it needs to be super high tech. Just enough to have cold sodas and some snacks.” He listened to Dib yawn into his next words. “No need for, for like lasers or anything.”

Zim finally lifted his head to glower at his guest. “Lasers. Why would I put lasers on a fridge?”

Dib returned the glower but, his smile ruined the effect. “Well, I’m just going with your track record, really.”

There wasn’t really a whole lot he could do to defend himself from that and all his energy seemed to have vanished. So, Zim just increased the intensity of his glare. Amazingly, Dib seemed quite unperturbed.

“Just sayin’.” Dib shrugged.

“You’re horrible.” Zim retorted, with little heat.

“I learned it from watching you.”

Exasperated, Zim dropped his face back down to the mattress. For only having slept over a handful of times, the blankets still smelt like Dib.

They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes until something hit him.There was the noise of it softly falling to the floor. Zim lifted himself up and looked down at the weapon. It was the other bean bag chair. He turned a stern look to Dib.

“Must you? I conceded to allowing something as absurd as a ‘bean’ cushion in my home. When I voiced my complaints, you laughed at me. And now you insult me further by assaulting me with it.”

Dib smirked but, it had no real mischief behind it. “I just wanted to see if you were...okay, I guess.”

Zim blinked, was taken aback. And he thought of random strangers as they ask if he is having a good day. Of a neighbor who waved and smiled. Of silly humans as they waste precious minutes of their small life speaking with other humans, despite not knowing each other, despite forgetting each other hours later...

It was insane and Zim thought he loved it a little bit.

He thought of humans, fragile and strange and finite. He looked at Dib, knew he was human and that his life was ending even as they sat there.

Zim was terrified and he was determined. Because he might find many things about humans increasingly interesting and even delightful, but he wasn’t human. He was irken and he was a scientist, a warrior, a soldier with access to advanced technology. He was basically immortal and he had found a home, a friendship, a new mission. He won’t let go of the earth, of humans, of Dib easily. He won’t let Dib die.

Not today, not ever.

Zim sat up straighter. He nodded. “I am...okay. And you?”

Dib eyed him for a second, assessing him, checking him for truth. He must have found it because he smiled.

“Fine, spaceboy. I’m fine.”


	4. Maybe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AgentMothman is now online.
> 
> NORMALHUMANZIM is now online.

**AgentMothman-** Today at 4:31 PM  
hey  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
hello, earth child. How good has your day been?  
  
**AgentMothman** -Today at 4:32 PM  
first, I am no longer a child and you know it. I have graduated to earth adult. Earth grown-up. And secondly, I’m eternally impressed with your ability to mimic human small talk. And lastly, I’m doing ok. A bit nervous, I guess. Wbu?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
you will always be a pathetic small earth child to me.  
  
**AgentMothman** -Today at 4:33 AM  
thanks  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
But, nervous? Why?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
oh uh, i forgot to tell you I guess. I have a date.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
...a date?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
come on, you know what that is. You’ve been here nearly ten years, for crying out loud.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** -Today at 4:34 AM  
yessss I THINK i know? Mostly from television and overhearing conversations. It is the...prerequisite for a romantic relationship, yes?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
oh jeeze.  
kind of? I guess? I don’t know. Actually, you might know more than I do. I’m insane i don’t know why I’m doing this anyway. I’ve never been on a date before. I’m 21 and she’s nice and familiar and idk, she asked and I accepted  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
hmm  
  
**AgentMothman**  
what?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
well, what are you doing for this date?  
  
**AgentMothman** -Today at 4:35 PM  
a movie, i think? And dinner. Nothing fancy.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
why are you nervous?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
well, because uh  
i guess because of the expectations. You said it yourself, it could lead to a relationship.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
annnnd? This is something you do not desire?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
idk  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** -Today at 4:36 PM  
from my observations, romantic relationships seem to be rather...well, they consume human life. It is everywhere. I had not noticed you had never been involved one before.  
  
**AgentMothman**  
lol well, people have asked me out before, i guess. But, i guess I’ve just been thinking about it and it seemed like I might as well. Maybe just try it? Idk.  
you can see where my nervousness comes from though? I’m a huge wreck with no data to build from.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
we have been through this before, Dib-thing. You face such things as man eating beasts and unknowable mysteries on a near daily basis. You can handle something as common as a date.  
  
**AgentMothman** -Today at 4:37 PM  
pffftftf you’re right.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
of course I am.  
  
**AgentMothman**  
i mean, it's a once in a lifetime occurrence, but you are right.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
shut your lying mouth  
  
**AgentMothman**  
haha nah  
but I should go get ready I guess. I’ll talk to you later  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** -Today at 4:38 PM  
right  
  
**AgentMothman**  
wish me luck  
  
**AgentMothman** i _s now offline._  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** -Today at 4:39 PM  
good luck

* * *

 

Zim stared at the screen. He pressed a hand to his spooch and scowled. He was beginning to think that he was becoming ill.

“Computer, run a diagnostics scan of my person.” He paused for a second. “Please.”

The computer sighed heavily before complying. The data appeared on the monitor for Zim to eye warily. The same stuff popped up that he was used to. He’d long since accepted that his technology was faulty. No matter what upgrades he applied, certain incorrect findings never changed.

His pak was the same as it had always been, displaying all kinds of error readings. He brushed that off. His pak was fine. If it wasn’t he would know, would probably be dead.

Physically, he was in peak condition. He again, ignored the readings that claimed he had asthma. No, what he was looking for was something that would indicate why his spooch kept whirling, clenching up, fluttering and overall being a nuisance. It kept happening and it was starting to become worrying. And annoying.

There was nothing, except a slightly accelerated pulse rate. He angrily deleted the data and slumped backwards in his chair. He returned to staring blankly at their conversation. Somewhere he could hear Gir singing to himself.

Dib had a date. Zim felt his spooch clench up again. He scowled and opened up the internet’s search browser, typing in ‘romantic date definition’. Perhaps, it didn’t mean what he assumed it did.

It only took ten minutes for him to realize that he had not only been correct in his assumption but, that it was worse. Or better? No. Yes. What was wrong with him?

Zim shook his head. Nothing. Nothing of course. It’s just that the very concept of ‘romance’ of ‘dating’ was so abhorrent that it made him want to vomit. What was the appeal, even? None that he could see.

That was why it was especially disconcerting to picture Dib, the best human on this filthy rock, endeavoring to enter into such strange and pathetic customs. Why would he wish to? When there was so many more important and interesting things to consider? What could such a thing as a ‘relationship’ offer him?

Zim spun in his chair, thinking hard. Who was he even with? Who was ‘she’? ‘Nice’? ‘Familiar’? What did that even mean?

According to the information he’d learned on ‘dating’, there usually was some kind of passion involved in romantic relationships. At least at first. Right? Right.

Well, passion. Dib had that already. He had it for the paranormal and it was easy to see. It was his enthusiasm, his one track mind. The complete confidence in his decisions. It lit him up, made him grin and scowl and laugh and yell. It turned the human’s normally brown eyes so dark they were nearly black or bright and gold like the sun.

Such terms as nice and familiar...seemed so far removed from that.

Maybe Dib did feel some semblance of passion for this...for his date. Zim tried to imagine Dib turning all that passion onto a person, a faceless woman. Tried to imagine Dib feeling the same way for this ‘she’ as he did for haunted mansions, mysterious creatures, occult objects...

Instead of being impossible as he imagined it should’ve been, it was actually easy.

Easy enough that he suddenly felt like he wanted to vomit. He spent several minutes, trying to calm his breathing.

Zim didn’t understand why he felt this way. But, he KNEW that it was wrong. That Dib with some random woman, focusing his passion and attention on her was wrong. He swallowed. He spent minutes feeling like his skin was rebelling against him.

He itched all over. He itched to jump out of his chair, out of his lab and house and find Dib. Find him and safeguard him, protect him from his foolishness. To keep him where he belonged; in his room _(sitting at his computer chair, spinning and making observations),_ in the human area of Zim’s lab _(sunken in the ridiculous bean bag chairs, making fun of the terrible video games they bought)_ , in his terrible car _(pointing out landmarks, streets, places that held secrets that normal people had no idea of),_ beside Zim _(laughing, arguing, letting HIM in on all the secrets, the passion he had for his world and its mysteries)_.

Zim was lost. He had no point of reference. No idea what to do about his sudden urges, about his emotions that held no logic or reason. So, he sat frozen in indecision. What could he do, but wait and see what Dib said? Dib HAD said he would message him later. So, he would wait.

At first he tried to distract himself, to work on some projects he hadn’t had the time to, to read some books and reports that Dib had given him, to test some samples they’d found...but, he kept glancing at the screen, his mind kept wandering, wondering what Dib was doing.

Eventually, he just ended up hunched forward, face on his arms, staring blankly at the screen, at their last messages...

The little ‘ _Ding_ ’ that signaled that Dib was online, startled him so much that he nearly fell out of his chair.

* * *

 

 **AgentMothman** i _s now online.  
_  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 7:58 PM  
hello out there  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 7:59 PM  
HELLO  
I mean  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 8:00 PM  
hello  
  
**AgentMothman**  
lol no worries  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
How did the date go? Do you think you might marry her? Have children? Buy a two bedroom house with a white picket fence, near a good school system?  
  
**AgentMothman**    
WHAT? holy shit no  
I mean it was okay  
the movie was fairly interesting. You might like it. Lots of explosions and bad plot twists. and dinner tasted pretty alright. A bit bland. But, meh. And she was...well, like I said. She’s nice.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
oh  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 8:01 PM  
She tried to kiss me  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**    
OH?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
And I panicked a bit I shut the door in her face like a loser it was her own house and I just shut the door and ran  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
oh  
oh my irk  
  
**AgentMothman**  
yep I’m the master of romance, smooth moves and pure confidence  
  
**AgentMothman -** Today at 8:02 PM  
but yeah lol probably means there won’t be a second date which, I think I’m alright with   
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 8:11 PM  
Zim??  
You there?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 8:12 PM  
YES SORRY  
I was just  
laughing at you  
LOL  
  
**AgentMothman**  
well, what else is new?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
do you...wish to come over? You can help me analyze the samples from the last few cases  
  
**AgentMothman**  
really? You’ll actually let me help?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 8:13 PM  
as long as you follow procedure  
  
**AgentMothman**  
pfft alright, yeah just let me change and grab some things  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
whatever just hurry i won't wait for you all evening  
  
**AgentMothman**  
bossy

**AgentMothman** _is now offline._

_**NORMALHUMANZIM** i _s now offline.__

* * *

 

__Several Weeks Later..._ _

* * *

 

**_NORMALHUMANZIM_ ** _is now online._

**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 1:13 PM  
DIB  
DIB THING  
BIG HEAD  
DIB SMELL  
HUMAN CHILD

 **AgentMothman** _is now online._  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 1:14 PM  
Zim  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**    
I demand your presence  
  
**AgentMothman**    
How polite of you. But, I can’t. Sorry. I have a date.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
What??! But, you already went on one  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 1:15 PM  
lol yeah with Gretchen. Like three weeks ago. And it was ok. Until I slammed her own door in her face. But, uh this is a different person.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 1:16 PM  
oh  
  
**AgentMothman**  
fuck ok, i don’t even know why I’m so nervous about telling you this. Bc you’re an alien and as far as I know you could care less? I guess its just my own stupid stuff. And you’re like...my friend. So...  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
what...what are you talking about?  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 1:17 PM  
ok  
They’re a guy. His name is Alistar.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
uh  
i do not understand

  
**AgentMothman**  
The person I'm going on a date with is a guy  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
ok?  
I'm still confused  
Why are you nervous???  
  
**AgentMothman**  
yeah, I kind of guessed that would be your reaction, actually.  
still pretty relieved though  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 1:18 PM  
Dib I am STILL CONFUSED  
and kind of itchy  
  
**AgentMothman**  
thanks for sharing  
um...it’s a silly human thing. especially nowadays.I’m just...testing some things. About myself. Making sure I’m open to all possibilities.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
DIB STOP TALKING LIKE AN IDIOT  
I  
DO  
NOT  
KNOW  
WHAT  
YOU

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** \-  Today at 1:19 PM  
ARE  
SAYING  
  
**AgentMothman**  
its ok sorry  
i'll tell you all about it later  
I’m actually a bit surprised this hasn't come up sooner.   
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
whatever  
this...."Alistar"  
Is he also nice and familiar?  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 1:20 PM  
haha I mean, he’s nice. Or at least he seems to be. And I’ve known him for a few weeks. He works at the little gas station near by.  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
uh huh  
  
**AgentMothman**  
I have to go, but i’ll talk to you later  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
OK

**AgentMothman** _is now offline._

_**NORMALHUMANZIM** is now offline._

* * *

 

 

Alistar was very attractive; long bright blond hair that was tied back into a messy tail, big green eyes, tall and slender, chiseled features. Alistar was incredibly intelligent; he was majoring in journalism, and working two jobs to help pay for it. Alistar was funny; his humor was sarcastic without being cruel, his laughter was infectious and it made people all around them turn and stare.

Dib had no idea what the fuck he was doing.

Alistar was nice and he was handsome. Just like how Gretchen was nice and beautiful. Dib knew they were incredible people, and he felt quite flattered that they would so much as glance at him, let alone ask him out.

But, he felt...nothing. Well, maybe not NOTHING. He laughed, he blushed at the easy compliments, he had a good time. But, that was it.

And alright, maybe he was a bit bored.

There was nothing that gripped him in his gut and made him want to stay, to figure out everything he could about the person across from him. Should it be like this? Should it be easier? Harder?

He had no idea. He’d never even had crushes before. At least he didn’t think so anyway. Romance was confusing.

Maybe if he stuck it out, waited a bit longer, there would be something to the subtle glances thrown his way, to the brushing of hands and nervous smiles. Maybe.

But, he was restless. All Dib could think about was their most recent case. The influx of dark magical items entering into the black market and wherein all signs pointed towards some new cult. How they’d managed to track down a couple of the artifacts; a heavy leather bound book, a silver hand mirror, a jeweled dagger. They’d reeked of dark magic, the kind that you knew could make your organs turn inside out, make it feel like every skin cell was on fire. Dib couldn’t stop thinking about Zim’s expression of alarm and distaste. How it had faded slowly to a primitive curiosity. How he’d automatically turned to Dib, eager to listen to anything he could tell the irken. And they’d talked for hours, so late into the night that it was morning.

It was easy. It was fascinating. 

Maybe romance just wasn’t for him.

It wasn’t like Dib’s life lacked anything. In fact, he was quite happy right now. Happier than he could ever remember being. Huh.

Maybe one day he’d find someone, someone who he 'clicked' with. Someone who made him laugh and intrigued him. Someone who Dib trusted and had a lot in common with.

But, until then...

“Good night.” Alistar said, looking rather hopeful. Dib returned the smile and held his hand out to shake. The hopeful look faded into one of disappointment but, also understanding.

“Night. Thanks for the lovely evening.” 

* * *

 

**AgentMothman** _is now online._

**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 7:34 PM  
so, i don’t think i’m going to date anymore  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
oh, really?  
  
**AgentMothman**  
yeahhh i just dont know if its for me? They were both quite nice but yeah.  
it was boring haha  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM** \- T oday at 7:35 PM  
Good  
  
**AgentMothman**  
Good?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
I had trouble imagining you turning your attention and passion for the paranormal on anything else  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 7:36 PM  
pretty much  
plus, i dont know what I would even do if I got a girlfriend/boyfriend/whatever...  
i’d have to like...make time for that and tbh  
my life is pretty full rn  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
hmm I am glad  
  
**AgentMothman**  
:D  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
I am glaring at the screen right now  
you and your horrible emotion symbols  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 7:37 PM  
haha anyway!  
what have you been doing?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
I was attempting to read this stupid book you lent me  
  
**AgentMothman**    
you just think it's stupid because you don’t understand it  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
shut up it is stupid  
  
**AgentMothman** \-  Today at 7:38 PM  
want me to come over and explain it to you?  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**  
no i can figure it out on my own  
  
**AgentMothman**  
if you say so  
  
**NORMALHUMANZIM**    
but come over anyway  
  
**AgentMothman**  
lol okay

**AgentMothman** _is now offline._

_**NORMALHUMANZIM** is now offline._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHO MADE TWO DIFFERENT DISCORDS IN ORDER TO DO THE CHAT FOR THIS BC I HATE TYPING OUT THEIR NAMES OVER AND OVER???


	5. Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorrys and forgiveness. Just another day on earth. Another day with humans. With Dib. Doing things that he’d been conditioned not to. Strangely, he felt okay with it. He watched a big smile warm the human’s face and ZIM felt an answering one tug at his own lips. For a few seconds, all they did was grin at each other.

They were sitting in the car again.

If ZIM had known that signing onto the paranormal investigating business meant hours upon hours in Dib’s filthy vehicle, he might’ve hesitated a moment longer. As it was, the spring sun beat down on them, magnified by the windshield, the only respite being the slight breeze coming through the rolled down windows.

Dib leaned forward, hands wrapped around a cup of something caffeinated, eyes glued to the building they were staking out.

ZIM on the other hand was slumped so far down in his seat he was practically lying down. He also stared at the building but, his eyes were glazed over, mind elsewhere.

The premises appeared to be a common office building and for all intensive purposes it was, housing massage clinics and insurance firms. Except for the fact that every piece of evidence they had acquired, suggested that someone was running an incredibly illegal occult item smuggling ring out of it.

They’d sat in mostly silence for the last hour and a half. It was a testament to both of their newfound maturity. Had it been a year ago, someone would be screaming by now. Boredom wasn’t something either of them found particularly palatable.

“Hey.” Dib’s voice was deep and startled ZIM into a sitting position. He was immediately ashamed of his poor posture. His superiors would’ve drilled into him for that.

“What?” His own voice was stiff with embarrassment. He missed Dib’s eyebrow raise, the slight quirk of his lips.

“I’m sorry.” And he sounded genuinely regretful. This more than anything made ZIM confused.

“Eh. Yes, well. I wasn’t the one who decided to take this case. And I would’ve been more than happy to just,” He pantomimed punching a window. “Break in. So, apology not accepted, I guess.” His antenna quirked under his hat at Dib’s snort. ZIM turned to the human and glared.

“That’s not what I was apologizing for, genius. I have no regrets about taking this case, even if it is taking a bit longer than I thought it woul--”

“A Bit?!”

“Yes, spaceboy, a ‘bit’. You’re the biggest whiner I know. We’ve only been here for a few hours.”

ZIM crossed his arms and resolutely turned away from the human. “Hours that we could have used to break in, scout the place, and taken down this pathetic little establishment.” He didn't need to see Dib to know he was rolling his eyes. “We could be drinking sodas and playing Mortal Combat by now.”

“Yeah yeah. And we might’ve immediately blown it and ended up in a cage somewhere underground. And be waiting for them to take our unnecessary organs by now.”

“You are incredibly pissimistic.”

“Shut up. It’s ‘pessimistic’, for one. And two, I’m realistic. Three, are you going to let me talk anytime soon?” ZIM waved his hand flippantly in a ‘continue’ motion. “I was saying that I’m sorry. For all the times that I threatened to vivisect you. Or put you on an autopsy table. Or anything along the same lines.” Dib turned back to looking at the building, at the crumbling brick, peeling paint.

ZIM sat up very straight. “Wha-what?”

Dib shrugged, not quite nonchalantly. “We’re friends now. And uh...well,” He clutched his cup harder than he had to. “We kind of...well we were really shitty to each other for a long time. And maybe it's time to start...trying to fix it? At least a little bit. I don’t know if it will actually do anything, or help in anyway because it's not like we can go back and change it. Plus, I don't even know if it's actually a big deal to you anymore? And we both probably did what we did simply to survive or to further our cause but, I don’t know...that stuff, the autopsy stuff....wasn’t anything like that. It was just...cruel?”

“Dib...”

“Just...just let me finish ok? I honestly, doubt I would’ve ever had the gumption to actually go through with it. Remember we did that cat autopsy in freshman year and I nearly threw up? And it was DEAD and not like it was ever...you know, speaking and expressing similar emotions to mine. So, even if I had ever somehow managed to get you on a table...there’s no way I would’ve been able to do anything about it other than gloat.”

ZIM knew he was staring, he was unable to stop. Dib’s face was slightly pink in places, especially his ears and he had this expression, something rare, something ZIM was unsure if he had ever seen before.

“So yeah. Sorry if I gave you nightmares or anything.” There. It was out now and Dib felt quite relieved. Clichely, like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders that he had no idea was even there in the first place. ZIM was quiet for so long, Dib’s curiosity got the better of him and he turned to look at the alien. His confusion was palpable. 

“Eh...I am...confused.”

Dib grinned. “Yeah I got that. What about?”

“Why? Why are you saying this to me now?” ZIM made a small grabbing motion towards Dib’s forgotten drink. The human shrugged, and handed it over, watched his friend take a sip and make a disgusted face at the nearly black, mostly cold, coffee.

“I told you. Now that we’re friends...I just really regret that particular thing and I wanted to try and, I guess, make amends even if only in a small way. Um,” ZIM shoved the drink back at him. “It’s alright if you don’t have anything you want to apologize for.” He had never gotten the impression that ZIM felt remorse for anything he’d done. Like...ever.

What followed was a long stretch of silence that Dib took as confirmation of his suspicions. He wasn't really disappointed because he didn’t expect anything less. He actually went back to watching the building, to doing what they’re supposed to be doing.

“I am sorry for breaking your arm.” ZIM spoke quietly but it’s still too loud in the silence.

Dib blinked and turned back to the alien. “Huh? My arm?” He had to think back. “Oh. You mean in 8th grade?” ZIM just nodded, looked anywhere but at Dib. “It’s um...fine? It healed pretty quickly, thanks to dad. I had almost forgotten all about that, actually.” He watched the irken as he nodded again, as he examined his claws. “Can I...can I ask, why that thing in particular?” ZIM shrugged. Dib waited for a minute, feeling something in him deflate a bit. “Right.”

ZIM moved suddenly, pulled his legs up close to his body, wrapping his arms around them, huffing with frustration. “I spent weeks replaying that moment in my head. I knew that it would hurt you...letting you fall. I was fine with that. Found the idea hilarious, even. You cursed me and I laughed. But then you hit the ground and the sound...it was loud,” Dib could see the irken’s face, saw his expression and knew from experience and careful (near obsessive) observation that he was remembering it, vividly. “and the noises you made...I pretended like I was fine with it. Like it was part of my plan. I remember feeling...Like I was going to throw up. For days.”

Dib remembered it a bit better now. He knew they’d both been injured quite often during their fights. But, broken bones were rare. He sipped his coffee out of habit, only remembering just before it hit his lips that it is now disgusting. He cringed and forced himself to swallow before  he dumped the rest of it out the window.

“It’s alright, ZIM. I forgive you.” Dib wasn’t just talking about his broken arm. But, every drop of blood, every humiliation, every sleepless night and moment of despair.

ZIM uncurled a bit, and side eyed the human. “I...forgive you as well.” For the blood, the humiliation, the terror and rage.

ZIM’s words were stiff and awkward. Sorrys and forgiveness. Just another day on earth. Another day with humans. With Dib. Doing things that he’d been conditioned not to. Strangely, he felt okay with it. He watched a big smile warm the human’s face and ZIM felt an answering one tug at his own lips. For a few seconds, all they did was grin at each other.

There was movement and they both looked quickly at the building. A pair of unsavory looking gentlemen in black suits and heavy briefcases were leaving, deep in conversation.

“That’s got to be them!” ZIM nearly yelled, claws curling into fists. Dib grimaced in agreement. Over the last couple weeks they’d tracked down several artifacts, objects and items. All of which were heavily cursed. Everything from a thick bound journal that made you want to scratch your eyes out to a hair brush that made the user fall madly in love. Key word: madly. The bottom line was that these assholes were responsible for many deaths.

ZIM’s first instinct was to jump out of the car and start assaulting people. His second was to slide down in his seat, lest he be seen and blow their cover.

Dib let him do neither. He grabbed the irken's shoulder to hold his attention. “We’re having a conversation. Don’t look at them.”

ZIM nodded. Dib’s fingertips burned a hole through his shirt fabric, warmed his skin, made it buzz with awareness. “The briefcases...they’re obviously using them for transport. They have to be...magically reinforced.” The words may have once sounded ridiculous and he was simultaneously proud and embarrassed at how easy they came to him now. “Are they also the ones casting?”

Dib dropped his hand and ZIM found that he missed it immediately. He shoved the sensation away like he did with lots of weird feelings he didn’t understand these days.

“Hard to believe. They don’t exactly look the magic type.” Dib muttered and his eyes were dark with passion, questions, a thousand theories. “But, we’ve only ever seen the two of them publicly associated with the ring.”

The two men, one short and thin, the other tall and large, walked past their car and made their way into the parking lot toward a nice and nondescript black Honda.

ZIM glared at them in his side-view mirror. “What shall we do?”

Dib raised an eyebrow. “Your original plan. Fancy a bit of breaking and entering?”

The irken blinked then grinned deviously. “Do you even need to ask?”

* * *

 

 

Dust motes fell and his room was stuffy.

Dib knew he should get up and open a window but, that would require moving. Something that he wasn’t sure was possible right now. The blood had dried already but, it still hurt. He licked his lips and tasted it there too. Dib struggled to remember the reason behind his current state of injury. It was blurry but...

They had walked into the building without difficulty and found the proper room. Their added experience made breaking in quick and easy. They counted on there being possible magical booby traps and locks.

What they didn’t count on was another person. The one who was casting all the curses. She was a witch and powerful to boot. That happened when you stopped caring about things like morals when it came to magic. To everyone’s surprise, they recognized her. She used to be a part of the Blue Rose coven, one of their earliest cases.

Then, Dib thought hazily, ZIM had gotten in the way. Stupid and reckless, hopped up on adrenaline. He’d yelled at her, baiting her and she was going to hurt him. Maybe kill him. 

And instead of being smart, instead of chucking something at her or even just creating a distraction, he’d thrown himself in front of the alien and ended up broken and bleeding. He remembered spots of colors in front of his eyes and the irken’s shocked face. His scream of rage. Dib remembered the sickening feeling of warm blood as it flowed from his nose, his mouth, his ears...

Dib remembered ZIM doing something weird; of six, shaking claws holding his face in his hands. And just before Dib blacked out he remembered the word ‘please’. In English, in irken, whispered over and over again.

He groaned as the door to his room opened. ZIM walked in, looking pale and fearful. He was mumbling to himself but, as he saw Dib his expression changed to relief. “You. You’re alive.” That relief was quickly replaced by anger, as he rushed to the bed and clutched at the boy’s bloody shirt.

“Wh-what happened?” Dib wondered, through a mouth that felt filled with cotton. He really meant, ‘how am I alive?’

“That stupid witch cursed you to bleed from every orifice. I used your cellular device to call the leader of the coven, the Eyeballs and your dad...all while trying to hold your blood inside of you.” ZIM’s face was a pale green, undisguised eyes wide and worried. “But, you lost a lot. It was everywhere, Dib.”

The human tried to swallowed but failed. Mouth so dry. ZIM’s clothes were caked with blood. His blood. “Oh.”

No wonder he felt so stiff and dizzy. ZIM’s claws were still clutching his tshirt. Dib looked up at the irken and saw the haunted fear in his eyes. ZIM had never done well with blood. But, he’d stayed beside him despite that. A warmth filled his chest and how sick was that?

“Thanks…” Dib sniffed, raising a hand that felt too heavy from his side and cautiously placed it over the alien’s. To reassure. _It’s over. I’m still here._

That seemed to shake ZIM from his position. His eyes narrowed and he pulled away, wrapping his arms around himself unconsciously. “Yeah. Well. Don’t do it again. It was gross.”

“I will try not to ever bleed again.” Dib replied sarcastically.

“Yeah.” ZIM said distantly, obviously not getting the sarcasm. “Good.”

Dib sat up, instantly getting a roaring headache that had been lying in wait. He groaned and shut his eyes. Two hands shoved him back down and ran over him anxiously.

Dib looked up to see ZIM, eyes wide with alarm, breathing heavily. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, ZIM. It’s just a he—“

“The witches said you might randomly start bleeding again. Do you feel like you might start bleeding again?”

“No. It’s just a hea-“

“Because if you do, I might have to kill you or go get them again.”

“ZIM! Calm down.” He reached up and grabbed the alien’s head. “I’m fine. It’s just a headache. You’re freaking out.”

ZIM froze at the touch, realizing he really was kind of freaking out and blinked a few times before shaking himself. “No, I’m not. I’m just a bit concerned about this whole bleeding from every orifice thing. It’s kind of bad.”

Dib let his hands drop to his side. “I know. I’m fine now though. You can relax.” He watched as ZIM tried to calm himself down, wringing his hands and looking quite anxious. He would have a panic attack if Dib let this go on. Odds are he already had had one while Dib was unconscious.

Despite the horrible headache, Dib sat up again and grunted, reaching out towards ZIM. “Hey. Come here, genius.”

Whether it was the nickname or how pathetic Dib looked, he didn’t know, but ZIM gave in. He crawled up on the bed and sat next to the human, pressing their shoulders together. Dib swallowed and grimaced at the metallic taste before he hesitantly wrapped an arm around ZIM. The alien was shaking and cool to the touch.

“It’s okay, you know? I’m...okay.” No response. Dib tried again. “You did good, ZIM. You...you saved my life.” Pause. “Again.”

The irken shuddered against him and as if some invisible string had been cut, he leaned heavily into the human, pressed his face against Dib’s shoulder and entire body curling into him.

Dib blinked uncomprehendingly at the wall for a moment before he tightened his grip. It was kind of nice actually. Human contact. Well, just contact, after a near death experience. He usually just took a long hot shower and tried to forget about it.

Unbidden, a memory rose up of that night, months and months ago, during the giant thunderstorm. When the power had gone out and ZIM had been shuddering in much the same way. They’d touched a lot then too. Dib felt his face heat and he mentally shook his head to clear it of the thoughts. That had been a mistake. This wasn’t anything like that.

They sat that way for a few minutes. Until Dib felt his headache start to wane and the shudders coming from ZIM weren’t as violent. He was hesitant to break the silence but, he was suddenly full of questions. “You called my dad?”

ZIM jumped a little bit and pulled away as if Dib had suddenly caught on fire. “What?” He looked flushed and confused. But, at least he was no longer pale from anxiety.

Dib raised an eyebrow. “You said you called my dad.” ZIM nodded disorientedly. “Yes. He uh, he’s downstairs.”

“Did he actually...believe you about the magic stuff?”

ZIM scoffed and it was good to hear. “Of course not. I just said you were in trouble and bleeding and he was on his way with a whole team of medics.”

Dib inclined his head, that made sense. “And the witches?”

“They came soon after. The medics were able to give you new blood from a bag but, couldn’t figure out how to stop you from bleeding. The witches fixed it quite quickly.” Dib would’ve given good money to see his father and science lackeys interacting with a coven of highly eccentric witches. Speaking of which...

“And what about uh, the one that cursed me?”

The irken glowered at him darkly. “Incapacitated and under Eyeball watch.”

Dib licked his lips. Damn his mouth was dry and awful. He opened his mouth to ask for something to drink but, was interrupted as something was shoved in his hands. A bottle of water. He looked up at ZIM in surprise. ZIM just glared at him.

After he nearly finished it off, Dib tilted his head to the side. “So...did you do the incapacitating?”

The glare intensified. “Of course I did. I nearly fucking killed her. It’s pure luck that I did not.”

The human stared at his partner, unsure what to comment on first. The use of a human curse word (granted, Dib used it all the time but, he’d never expected ZIM to pick up on it) or the fact that ZIM had been so enraged at this very dangerous witch that he’d nearly killed her. So, instead he said nothing about it at all.

“I doubt that our businessmen are going to be coming back to that place after all the excitement.”

ZIM crossed his arms over his chest. Dib knew that even that action had its nuances. Sometimes he did it because he was angry, sometimes because he was trying to close himself off, and other times like he was trying to hold himself together. Right now, it seemed like all three. When ZIM spoke, his voice was stiff. 

“I gave the Eyeballs as much information about them as possible. And there’s everything we found in the office. We also have their caster. This is a serious blow to them, Dib.”

The human sighed, considering all that. “Right. Well, I doubt they’ll stop completely.”

ZIM remained silent, face turned slightly away. Dib nudged him. “What is it?”

And suddenly, he was on the receiving end of a venomous glare. “‘ _What is it?’ What. Is. It?!_   You nearly died! I should not have to continue to save your life, Dib! You should not be so...so..” Unable find the proper words, he screamed in frustration. Dib felt his headache returning. Along with a familiar bristling sensation of annoyance. “Reckless!”

At this, he couldn’t keep silent. “Me?! I wouldn’t have had to jump in front of you if you hadn’t been being a reckless idiot in the first place!”

ZIM jumped to his feet and they carried him across the room. “Shut up! I am not human! I am not weak! I would have been fine!”

Dib scowled. “You still bleed, ZIM. You still would’ve been seriously injured.”

The irken spun on his heel, hands flying to his antenna, tugging on them. “No, no. You do not understand! You don’t get it! You...you...could die...you will...no you won’t...I can’t...let you...” His previously loud voice had faded to a almost unaware muttering. 

Dib’s ire so quick to rise, faded. He felt lost in the face of the irken's obvious distress. He sighed and tried not to feel guilty because he had done it to save ZIM, after all. And how strange was that? ZIM was upset because Dib had done something reckless to save him.

They’d come so far.

It made his chest ache a bit to see the irken so upset. And simultaneously, he felt like he was encased in warmth.

On wobbly legs, he stood and shuffled until he stood behind his friend. He placed a hand on his back. The irken was shaking again. ZIM jumped but, didn’t look at him.

“ZIM, I...I’m sorry. I, I will do my best not to do anything as reckless in the future. Only if you promise to do the same.” Silence except for a suspicious sounding snuffling sound coming from the irken. “It’s never been easy with all of this, with us. But, I know I did it because I care about you and...I would have rather died than see you hurt.” And the truth of that statement as it came from his mouth nearly made his already wobbly knees collapse. How had this happened? He took a steadying breath. “And I could be wrong but...I think you feel the same.”

There was a tense second before ZIM nodded. Dib swallowed, unsure of when his throat had gotten so tight. He felt a bit of panic in his chest. He very much did not want to be crying today on top of everything else.

“I...I forgive you for being a reckless idiot sometimes...can you...forgive _me_?”

Dib wanted to die in the near minute of silence that followed, he nearly gave it up for a loss, to try again another day when things weren’t so tense. But, then he was falling backwards onto his bed as a upset irken tried to crush them together.

Damn, ZIM was strong, he thought distantly. The hug was desperate and Dib tried to ignore the continuous snuffling sounds ZIM made out of courtesy. He did his best to return the embrace, still finding so much touching to be a bit jarring.

But, this was ZIM. This was his best friend, his partner. The person he was closest to in the entire world.

So, he just held on and let himself be held until the sniffing noises stopped and all that was left was the silence of a suburban neighborhood.

Dib cleared his throat. “So...is that a yes?”

“Shut up.” ZIM replied.

And it was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am a plagiarizer of my own work. The second half is a rewriting of 'a little bit worried' from my creatively named 'Everything is ZaDr' series.  
> ALSO,  
> TENSES?? WHAT EVEN ARE THEY??


	6. Wrestling With Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ZIM threw his arms in the air, unable to help himself. “Yes! I did it! Victory for ZIM!” He heard the human’s answering laugh ring out alongside his own. It echoed across the desert, making small creatures scatter, coming back to them like the earth was celebrating alongside them. “Truly, I am amazing!” He gloated out of pure habit.
> 
> And Dib’s laugh was clean and pure with no hint of mocking as he said, “Yeah. Yeah, you are.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO. It's surely been a long time hasn't it?? Over a year! Aaaaaa! I'm so sorry. 
> 
> I gotta say that this last year was...pretty hard. It was a lot of anxiety and depression. My heart got broken. Plus, I kind of got into BBC Merlin and Batman. And I've been busy with college. Basically, what I'm saying is that I had SEVERE writer's block. Only within the last few months have I written anything. Even now it's kind of difficult. 
> 
> But, things have been a bit better. And THERE'S GONNA BE A MOVIE. I mean, we knew there was. BUT THE TRAILER IS GORGEOUS. And so I kind of got re-inspired. 
> 
> PLUS. YOU'RE ALL AMAZING. YOU LEAVE ME SUCH LOVELY COMMENTS AND REVIEWS. Thanks so much. It makes me so happy to see people enjoying this story that I've been working on since 2012. Like damn. It means the world to me. And they press me forward, making me want to keep writing. You're all lovely and I hope you enjoy this. 
> 
> Things heat up a bit~

 

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** _is now online._  
**AgentMothman** _is now online._

 **AgentMothman**  -Today at 9:14 PM  
HEY so we got a lead!!  
are you ready for this??  
And it’s actually promising! Like there are SEVERAL EYEWITNESSES in the last few days

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** - Today at 9:18 PM  
YES

 **AgentMothman**  
it’s actually kind of incredible?  
I never would have guessed where it was spotted  
actually that’s untrue it’s obvious but i was just so focused on thinking that it would be where the last sighting was and got stuck in that loop

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  -Today at 9:19 PM  
Dib, I really don’t care  
just send the information you complete imbecile

 **AgentMothman**  
Truce.  
Over.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  
Good!!!!!!!

 **AgentMothman**  -Today at 9:20 PM  
[LINK]

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** - Today at 9:21 PM  
hmmm....  
Yes, I can see why this would be. the area is close enough to the river, surrounded by farmland...and it’s the ideal climate. The perfect habitat for that foul, disgusting creature.

 **AgentMothman-** Today at 9:22 PM  
oh come on, it’s not THAT gross

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  
it’s grosser than you are.  
and that is saying something. You are absolutely revolting.

 **AgentMothman**    
Yeah??? Well you’re green.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**    
Well spotted. Have I also expounded upon your wit?  
You have none.

 **AgentMothman**  -Today at 9:23 PM  
ANYWAY  
YOU LIZARD  
YOU LIZARD WITH NO NOSE OR PUPILS AND ANTENNA WHO COVERS HIMSELF IN GLUE AND WHO I SAW EAT ORGANS ONCE  
when shall we set our trap?

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  -Today at 9:25 PM  
As soon as possible.  
We have been hunting this thing for far too long.  
It is time to end this little game.

 **AgentMothman**    
......  
You know you don’t HAVE to talk like that All The Time

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  -Today at 9:26 PM  
Talk like what???  
I talk normally

 **AgentMothman**    
uhh

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  
I DO

 **AgentMothman**  -Today at 9:27 PM  
Uhhhhhhhhhh

 **NORMALHUMANZIM**  
YOU WILL SHUT YOUR CAKE HOLE

 **AgentMothman** - Today at 9:28 PM  
You talk like you’re...  
actually you're right  
you DO talk like that  
It just cracks me up. You’re like the villain of the week in a bad cartoon (well I guess you were a villain for a while, huh?)

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** \- Today at 9:29 PM  
I have no idea what you are talking about  
worm  
May we please commence with the plans to destroy this thing?

 **AgentMothman**  
We’re not going to destroy it and you know that perfectly well.  
We’re going to capture it and collect the bounty.  
And then with it I’m going to buy us some incredibly unhealthy food. As well as a new EMF meter because it was mysteriously knocked out of my hand by a jumpy space bean and shattered into, quite frankly, an unrealistic amount of pieces.

 **NORMALHUMANZIM** - Today at 9:31 PM  
yes yes yes  
no destroying, whatever.  
you never let me have any fun.

 **AgentMothman**  
;D That's my job 

* * *

 

 _“Hold your position. I just saw it heading towards section 3_.” Dib’s voice was deep and breathy in his antenna. The modified communicator was an invention they’d both worked on and as such it was perfect, hooked into his hat in lieu of ear pieces and without static.

This was good because it meant they could speak without interference.

This was bad because ZIM felt like Dib’s mouth was a breath away from his antenna and it sent an uncontrollable shiver down his spine. His skin felt hot. And not for the first time, he wondered if he was becoming ill. Contracting some kind of sickness from long exposure to Earth and its inhabitants.

He didn’t want to believe it because it's a terrifying thought. But, he could think of no other explanation for all the bizarre things he’d been experiencing lately; Skin tingling with phantom touches, a lack of appetite (even for his favorites!), hot flashes, stomach twisting and flipping sometimes so much he felt nauseous, shaking hands and weak knees, an uncomfortable awareness of his own body...

It had been happening for months now and only seemed to increase in frequency and severity. He needed to run another medical scan to discover the source. The last four hadn’t shown anything harmful but, there had to be SOMETHING wrong with him.

ZIM shook himself. He couldn’t think of that now. Not when there was something out there in the hot evening, hunting them as they hunted it. The irken swallowed and commanded his body not to shift despite the uncomfortable position he was in, crouched in tall grasses, insects curiously buzzing around him. If the monster was coming this way, he must not give any indication that he was nearby. The element of surprise was their best advantage.

 _“Spaceboy?”_ ZIM scowled as his entire body twitched, the human’s voice effortlessly breaking his decades long training in self control.

“What?” He hissed, clenching his fists. ZIM could perfectly picture the human’s answering glare.

 _“You’re supposed to acknowledge that you understand. So, I don’t think that you’ve been eaten or something._ ”

The irken fought the urge to growl in response. “I AM being eaten. There are mosquitoes everywhere. But, no sign of your monster.” He scanned the darkening vegetation around him. Mostly brown and dry, scratching its way through sand and heat. The sun was fading fast, with stars and a sliver of a moon to light the desert.

The human huffed in frustration. ZIM shared it. They’d been tracking this thing for weeks. The map on Dib’s bedroom wall was littered with red marks, circles, angry scribbles and pin holes.

But, this was their chance. They’d done everything in their power to block off any possible escape routes. There was bait in the form of several dead goats. They were prepped with cages and tranquilizers. They were as prepared as they could be.

“Relax, Dib-thing. We know it’s here. We will not fail.” He tried to fill his voice with as much determination as possible, to reassure the human the best he could. Silence. Then a small snort of laughter. Zim glared into the dim evening.

Dib’s voice was full of amusement. “ _I know, you little lizard._ ” The irken rolled his eyes. A couple years ago he would have still been insulted by such a name. Now, the words held the opposite of rancor, they were full of exasperation and fondness. It was impossible for him to feel anything other than a disgusting warmth in the center of his chest.

A very familiar warmth. And the flipping in his spooch, also familiar. A faint suspicion arose. But no, that was impossible. His illness had nothing to do with the Dib. Just because most of his symptoms occurred around the Dib didn’t mean that it had anything to do with him. ZIM spent most of him time with the human. It was a coincidence. Right? Right. He shoved it out of his mind.

“Shut your giant mouth and focus.” He shifted slightly, sand sliding beneath his boots. “The chalupa could be anywhere.”

 _“For the last time, Zim you KNOW it’s not called that. It’s a goddamn chupacabra and I will call this entire operation off to beat you up._ ” ZIM smirked, unrepentant. He pictured the human also crouching across the desert, in the darkness, face turned slightly pink, screwed up in irritation.

He opened his mouth to retort, only to stop when he heard a noise; like sand shifting under heavy feet, claws dragging across dead and drying plants.

It sounded close. Too close.

He squinted into the dark, his superior eyes allowing him to see what humans might not. His antenna twitched beneath his hat, stiff and straining to hear the sound again.

 _“Zim?”_ The human whispered. _“I heard something._ ”

The irken breathed back. “I did too...”

Dib sounded the way he always did when it came down to a moment like this; excited, determined. ZIM felt an answering thrill in his spooch like a Pavlovian response.

Then he froze. Wait.

It made sense that ZIM had heard the sound, if it had come from nearby. Dib shouldn’t be able to pick it up, even through their excellent communication device.

He broke into a run, throwing everything they’d planned aside in favor of getting to the human as quickly as his legs would carry him.

“Dib, it’s near you. Do not be an idiot.”

“ _Fuck.”_ Dib cursed and his voice was stiff with...not fear, but obvious displeasure. “ _You’re right_.”

“You are looking right at it, aren’t you?!” ZIM barked, forced himself to run faster, spider legs automatically bursting from his pak to assist.

 _“Yep. It’s definitely bigger than I imagined. Don't worry. I've got this._ ” Dib voice was barely above a whisper. Calm and steady.

And even though ZIM had seen Dib fight, had been on the opposite end of his punches, his speed and intelligence in the face of adversity...he was still afraid. Fear made him angry quicker than anything else.

“Do not engage!” He yelled into the communicator, as sand went flying beneath him. As he fought to lessen the distance between their bodies.

“ _Too late!”_ The idiot yelled back. ZIM roared with rage and felt like his spooch might burst as he forced himself to go even faster, towards where he knew Dib was. Face to face with a monster of legends. And it was an ugly thing, Zim knew from the photographs.

Finally, finally, after what felt like a thousand years, he saw them. The chupacabra, circling the human like so much prey. And Dib crouched, hand out like he might communicate. Moron!

The chupacabra must have sensed the irken coming because it had suddenly tensed up, body caught between fight and flight.

ZIM took the decision from it, throwing himself bodily into its side, yelling an irken war cry the way he had the first time he’d gone into battle. The chupacabra thrashed and struggled beneath him, growling loud and angry, attempting to bite and claw. It is bigger and should be stronger. But, protective rage and hundreds of years of machine honed evolution won out. ZIM snarled right back and pounded his tiny fist into the creature’s ugly head until it went limp.

Dib was by his side, kneeling, to quickly and efficiently wrap it’s limbs in ropes. “Overkill, don’t you think? We brought the tranqs for a reason. Also, I had that! It was listening to me. It must have some measure of intelligence. Despite all the killing. Though I suppose murderous intent never really disqualified intelligence,huh?”

ZIM climbed off the chupacabra’s unconscious form. “Shut. Up.” He swallowed, trying to get his breathing under control, telling himself he wouldn't bend over to put his hands on his knees and doing it anyway just for a second. “YOU. You!” He pointed down at the human’s fat head. “I said _not_ to engage!”

Dib was facing away, so ZIM couldn’t see his face. But, he KNEW the human was rolling his eyes. “Whatever, Genius. It was going to come at me, no matter what I did. But, it doesn’t matter, anyway. We have it! Finally!” He stood up and turned to ZIM, looking triumphant in the near darkness.

ZIM narrowed his eyes before finally looking back down at the creature and feeling a infectious thrill shoot through him. Here it was! Their monster, finally! After weeks of hunting for it, following false leads and chasing rumors. It was here, unconscious and tied up. Because of him!

And the human was safe. Dib was safe. Grinning at him like a fool.

The white hot rage he felt melted into a familiar adrenaline filled euphoria. It made him want to cackle and throw his fists into the air, yell at the inky blackness of the sky about his accomplishments.

ZIM gave into the urge to laugh. And for the first time in a long time, he let the feeling of sweet victory wash over him the way it had years ago when he still wanted to destroy the planet. When he’d gotten something right and everything had gone according to plan. It was still heady, made him feel giddy and light.

“We did it. Well, you did it.” DIb’s voice was full of his smile, approval, and relief.

ZIM threw his arms in the air, unable to help himself. “Yes! I did it! Victory for ZIM!” He heard the human’s answering laugh ring out alongside his own. It echoed across the desert, making small creatures scatter, coming back to them like the earth was celebrating alongside them. “Truly, I am amazing!” He gloated out of pure habit.

And Dib’s laugh was clean and pure with no hint of mocking as he said, “Yeah. Yeah, you are.”

In the near darkness, the irken could make out his bright grin, the mirth in his golden eyes that saw only him. ZIM blinked, genuinely taken aback for a second. Because in his life, in the parade of faces he could barely remember, no one had ever agreed with him. Agreed that he was special and worthy of praise. Until now. Until Dib.

ZIM’s grin hurt his face and he laughed again. Looked back at the human who had shaped his life, who was his friend, who looked like the embodiment of earth of itself. His chest felt tight and he was light, like he could suddenly walk without any gravity. ZIM felt like he could burst, like everything under his skin was vibrating with joy. It was the most amazing thing he’d ever felt before. 

“You dare agree with me!?” ZIM pounced, dug his claws into the human’s dumb shirt and they went down to the still warm sand. Dib shouted back, voice rough with glee. The human’s hands grabbed him back.

“What are you goin’ to do about it, huh?!” Dib chuckled.

They wrestled, pushed hands and feet and faces into the earth. Clawed at clothing, knocked knees and elbows, shoving each other away, pulling each other back in. They fought but not out of any kind of fear or anger. Instead, they fought because it was fun, because they were happy, because they wanted to be close, wanted to touch and didn’t know any other way to do so. The two of them laughed and traded old insults.

The alien finally managed to end up on top, pressing his competitor into the sand. “Ah hah!”

But, instead of Dib being angry and screaming from pain or humiliation, he was grinning and huffing quietly with undignified giggles between trying to breathe.

ZIM could see him perfectly in the dark. And he was struck again with everything this human was; his bright gold eyes like the sun, all the lines in his face, the unruly black of his hair covered in sand, freckles and moles and the brown of his skin that leaked heat in ZIM’s hands, this boy who was a man now and who was in this moment and in many other moments the irken’s entire universe.

These feelings and thoughts had a hold on the very core of him, it tugged at him, a physical thing that brought him down until their foreheads touched. Distantly, he thought that Dib’s skin was sweaty and gross. He didn’t pull away.

The human’s laughter faded until it was just a smile. And then even that dissipated. Until they were just touching, legs and hips and chests, foreheads. Dib’s hands curled around his waist. One of the irken’s hands was clutching at the sand by the human’s head. The other one ZIM held above the human’s heart, feeling the fast rhythm against his palm like raindrops over the land. Life. Bringing life to a desert that had no idea that this was what it needed to feel whole. For the first time in its existence.

He could smell the human’s soap (mint and aloe, clean and safe), his exertion. The sweat was fresh from danger and joy. And he could see. Not just the darkening brown of warm irises, or the faint freckles and sand on skin, but deeper to the warmth of Dib’s entire being. He could feel the places where their bodies touched. He was hyper aware of the warmth, the feeling of skin on skin.

ZIM dragged his thumb carefully along the human’s cheek, through damp hair, to his ear. There was sand sticking to the damp skin. He brushed it away and traced the strange swirls of flesh, amazed at how intricate and delicate it was. Dib swallowed, his adam's apple bobbing and the alien pulled away a bit to watch,hypnotized by something he’d never bothered to notice before.

Large hand gripped his hips, tightening for a second before gentling. Dib’s hands that could put together delicate machinery and efficiently incapacitate a foe. They moved over his waist to his lower back, burning the memory of it into his skin, sliding up until they reached resistance in the form of his Pak.

ZIM stopped breathing for a second, searching the human’s face. Remembered the last time Dib had truly been close to his Pak, when they’d been enemies. A violent tearing and near death experience. In Dib’s eyes he saw nothing but curiosity and an understanding. The two of them remember. The near loss of total identity on both their parts that resulted in Dib being able to understand irken in a way he couldn’t truly explain by late nights of studying. In Zim sometimes knowing something about the paranormal before Dib told him about it. Memories and knowledge awakening like from a long sleep upon prodding.

Hesitantly, the irken curled his fingers through soft human hair, allowing the dark follicles to pour through his fingers. He repeated the motion over and over, memorizing the feel, noting how Dib’s pupils had expanded, how his eyes had darkened. Perhaps they would swallow him whole. The idea wasn’t scary.

ZIM felt a jolt when the human’s hands pressed slightly against his back where heated metal met flesh. Long fingers explored the edges of his pak, massaging the fabric over skin. Allowing someone so close to his pak was literally like letting someone hold the entirety of your being in their hand, your heart and brain and soul. And trusting them not to rip it from you. Like they had before in the past.

Irk help him, ZIM trusted him. Like he’d never trusted anyone before. It was terrifying in a entirely new way.

“Okay?” Dib asked, and it rumbled through ZIM’s body like thunder. He nodded his head, maybe a little too fast. But, he didn’t want this to stop. He didn’t think. Didn't know anything else but, the human’s thumbs as they pressed against the seam, as fingers curled over metal. He wanted to keep pressing the human, his human, into the sand, run his hands all over him and search out all their old scars. Recount the memories of pain and suffering and replace them with something new.

It was so overwhelming and confusing and he was on fire, he’s--

The chupacabra makes an awful screeching sound, signaling its return to wakefulness.

The irken jumped to his feet as if he’d been electrocuted. Dib’s hands fell to the sand and dug into its surface.

ZIM knew he was shaking. He was sick. He MUST be sick. There had to be some kind of explanation. Distantly, he noticed the human getting to his feet, shaking the sand out of his hair.

“Do you have your tranquilizer?” Dib asked, voice rough and unsteady.The chupacabra made another sound, beginning to twitch in its restraints. "Mine broke when we were...” He trailed off, looking confused and distant.

ZIM stiffened like he’s in an inspection line, pressing down everything he’s feeling. There’s a mission to complete.

“Yes, of course.” ZIM reached into his pak and pulled out the syringe, handing it to the human. Both of them are careful not to let their hands touch. Dib hurriedly kneeled down and subdued their prey. For a few seconds, all that can be heard is their breathing (heavy like they’d been running), a soft breeze that rustled the vegetation and the sounds of buzzing, clicking insects.

ZIM waited for Dib’s reaction,wondered if he would do what he did last time something like this had happened; _“Let’s just...not talk about this, okay? It...never happened. Nothing even...really happened anyway. We can just, just forget this.”_  

So, he’s a bit surprised when all that came was,

“Let’s go collect our bounty, huh?” Dib asked, cautiously.

ZIM nodded, brushed his own clothes off. Knowing it would be useless. He’d be finding sand everywhere for weeks. “Let’s.”

* * *

It’s only later after they've gone their separate ways that they freak the fuck out.

* * *

 

Dib sat in his computer chair and held his head in his hands. He replayed what had occurred just a few hours ago. ZIM sitting over him, alien eyes dark and expression something new and unreadable. The entire thing had felt...intimate. It forcibly reminded him of another similar experience; quiet, electric.

_They hardly breathed in the darkness. The storm raged on outside, rain beating against the window, demanding entrance and falling on deaf ears._

_They sat a little less than a foot apart, shaking for separate reasons that still somehow were the same._

This was somehow even more than that. This had been heat and pressure as they had pressed together over hot desert sands.

“Oh _god_.” He shook himself, sitting up straight. This was ZIM for crying out loud. This was ZIM who always smelled like Elmer’s Glue. Who was loud and annoying and wore ridiculous graphic t-shirts that said things like “ **TACO BABE** ” , and “ **Immortal (So Far)** ” and “ **Never trust an Atom. They make up everything**.” ZIM. His ex enemy, ally in the paranormal and best friend.

“It’s nothing. Just like last time.” Dib firmly told his Bigfoot figurine on the desk. “We’re close. Closer to each other than anyone else. And, and I was curious. We both were. Are.”

And that was true. He’d always been fascinated by ZIM’s eyes, antenna, Pak, internal organ, skin color, hands and feet...anything that made him inhuman. And ZIM was all the more fascinating for how he sometimes seemed more human than anyone Dib had ever met.

He knew that ZIM found humans to be strange. Dib to be stranger. In the past, he’d asked questions about Dib’s hair, ears, nose, and heart. 

“You see, just curiosity. We’re like, both scientists, right? Mutual experimentation. But, not like...like THAT. Right? Right.” Bigfoot looked nonplussed.

Dib swallowed hard and turned back to his computer. Tried to put it out of his mind. They HAD just achieved a huge victory after all. There were reports to be written and EMF meters to buy for reasonable prices. 

* * *

 

The nearest beaker shattered against the wall, the sound accompanied by his scream of rage.

“Impossible! There must be SOMETHING!” Zim bellowed, glowering first at the mess he knew he’d have to clean up then back at the computer screen.

_**Medical scan of Patient: ZIM (23-72-990-0116-163K) ** _

_**Scan: ALL < ** _  
_**Scan: Successful ** _  
_**Results: ** _  
_**-Respiratory inflammation (Mild)** _  
_**-BPM: 270** _  
_**-No recent skeletal fractures detected (See list of former injuries).** _  
_**-PAK DATA CORRUPTION DETECTED. Please seek out your nearest Control Brain for more information.** _

He growled low in his throat. “This is the same as it normally is! But, this is not normal!”

It was confusing and distressing. It was not understanding his own body or emotions and it was losing control. Doing and saying things that he never would have done a year ago. The sheer amount of feelings and sensations he'd felt tonight that he didn't understand was absurd. They had drowned his common sense and knocked him off center. 

He wrapped his arms around himself and only then noticed how he smelt faintly like Dib.

“Disgusting.” He told his Computer. It sighed heavily. Despite everything he felt himself relaxing.

He must think rationally about this. Instead of panicking like a smeet. “If it isn’t something medical, something that ingenious irken engineering can diagnose...it must be something that isn’t medical. Something unfamiliar to our machines. Something earthly.” And it might have something to do with Dib. ZIM swallowed, remembering how Dib was ALWAYS around when his symptoms happened. Tonight had been like all his symptoms combined and ramped up to 100x.

“Computer, pull up the Google.”

“YEAH. ALRIGHT.” It obeyed, though with a distinctly reluctant air.

ZIM cracked his knuckles and began his research.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ZIM'S IN LOVE. The poor, dumb bastard.  
> \--
> 
> Come say hi on tumblr-> http://gaylienz.tumblr.com/


End file.
